The essay is written by Judy Brady and published in the 20th century during a time when
feminism is gaining momentum in the United States. She employs satire, irony, exaggeration,
and repetition to highlight the unrealistic and ridiculous expectations placed on wives. In the
essay, Judy exposes unfair societal expectations placed on women, particularly within the
marriage institution. Women’s rights are still an ongoing struggle even in the 21st Century as
women across the world continue to fight for their rights in almost every aspect of life.
Judy starts the essay by defining her true position as a woman. She says, “I belong to
that classification of people known as wives. I am A Wife. And, not altogether incidentally,
I am a mother.” By this statement, she presents herself as a voice for wives and mothers. This
puts her in the best position to air out the challenges and unrealistic expectations of men from
their companions. The narrator’s male friend who is recently divorced, awaits a new life, leaving
the child as a responsibility of his ex-wife. He doesn’t take time to heal, but rather wants another
wife there and then. This vividly shows how women were treated like objects that can be
replaced at anytime. He already wants a new wife who will serve as his ex-wife’s replacement
for domestic and emotional roles. This is why the narrator reflects on wanting a wife, too.
“As I thought about him while I was ironing one evening, it suddenly occurred to me that
I, too, would like to have a wife. Why do I want a wife?
Judy writes the essay from the perspective of a male who desires a wife to take all the
responsibility of domestic work and emotional labour so that he can solely focus on his career.
Firstly, she identifies the ridiculous expectations of a husband from his wife, which he
can’t fulfill on his own. The narrator wants a wife who will take care of the children, keep track
of their doctor and dentist’s appointments, wash their clothes, and ensure that they eat properly.
This should be a shared role in marriage rather than leaving it to the woman alone. It clearly
portrays inequality in marriage. Surprisingly, some men still have this chauvenistic mind set and
expect house chores to be done by only women. No wonder there are increasing levels of divorce
today, and a lack of empathy has also played a big role in this.
The author uses the repetition of “I want a Wife” to clearly portray the selfishness of
some men in marriage. He wants a wife who will work and send him to school, and also go
ahead to take care of the family single-handedly, so that he can not miss classes at school.
Ironically, wives should silently endure burdens without complaint. This reflects an imbalance in
marital roles and responsibilities.
Judy also exposes the selfishness of men in her time when she says,
“I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and
eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure that I am satisfied. And, of course, I want
a wife who will not demand sexual attention when I am not in the mood for it. I want a wife
who assumes the complete responsibility for birth control, because I do not want more
children.” This clearly indicates inequality in marriage. Similarly, in contemporary society,some men expect women not to demand conjugal rights and to also be in charge of family
planning. In my opinion, women should be treated as companions and not service providers.
In a nutshell, “I Want a Wife” is a compelling critique of gender roles within the
marriage institution. The essay remains a relevant and powerful commentary on inequality,
calling upon society to strive for fairness and balance in marriage. Judy ends the essay with a
satirical statement. “My God, who wouldn’t want a wife?”
She uses a casual tone that mocks men and encourages rethinking of traditional roles in
marriage. Judy calls for a more equitable and balanced approach to relationships with a focus on
mutual respect and consideration for each other’s needs and objects.